Sunday, March 05, 2006

Fear, Joy, and Tree droppings.

last section first: tree droppings

some trees in the backyard are dropping mangoes. Other trees are dropping cashews. So far only one fruit that hasnt rotted on the ground or been eaten up by fellow creatures. I've never had it before. I was lucky to get that one.

fear

yesterday morning the bus from Bangalore to Palakkad dropped me off outside of town on the bypass at 4am instead of 5:30 like They had said. I woke up with a start when the bus conductor yelled out for who was getting off at Palakkad, and tried to gather my wits and my stuff. Couldn't find the clip for my hair immediately, so I moved onto my shoes on my feet and glasses on my nose, but I wasn't happy about getting off the bus with my hair out. Things were unsafe enough without me being all temptress coiffed.

My children, when will you learn to Never Fear. simply trust your angel.

There was an aunty and uncle walking up just as I was getting off. I had noticed them from the bus, and now as I get chucked off this bus at night (night means dark. this is important) with my ears still plugged from the altitude difference, my eyes still scratchy, my hair blowing around, my voice frogged up, I try and catch them before they walk past, i mean, where else am i going to find a woman on these roads? So yeah, my frog croaks, my eyes scritch scratch, my hair blows, and my ears can just barely make out that they're immediately and wonderfully overprotective, just like all these mangolandians in these parts. Brief conversation in Malayalam, in which I of course come off looking like an idiot, but who cares I, as long as they tell me where I need to go and I get there without being raped at least on this stretch of the ride. Exactly that happens. They put me in an auto, tell the driver to take me to the KSRTC bus stand, and squeeze my hand goodbye.

Yes, folks. Raped. This section is about fear, remember? I started writing it thinking it was going to by mostly about other people's fear, but that was before I remembered that there is no Other.

Halfway there I realize there's no meter, and shit, of course I didn't check with them, or at least decide before we left,

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